Wednesday, June 2, 2010

.nervousness and laughter.

Oh what a day! Last Wednesday in my High School Career! Woofta! that's crazy

The day was awesome though!
Before school I enjoyed walking with my black and white poka dot umbrella to get my doughnut, purple sunglasses, and fake tattoo for senior week! =) I loved seeing everyone where the dorky sunglasses around school all day. Oh and might I add, the pink lines that people didn't know they had on the side of there noses from the glasses paint rubbing off. Oh the joys of being at the top of the chain and having the ability to look like a dorkel!

4th hour we finished watching the movie UP (i think) while I signed Kailes yearbook! It took that long. I did leave class early though so I could get my haircut! Nothing dramatic but a trim with some layers so its not so BLAH! I ended up getting my eyebrows waxed too. haha I was nervous I would walk back into school with red marks around my eye brows. but I was safe! haha

We picked up grandma today from the airport! I'm glad she's here! I've missed her! And she brought Banana chips that my grandpa made for me =)

Tonight was baccalaureate! I got the opportunity to speak! I was nervous out of my mind for some reason! And for some reason I feel like that's the only thing that people saw - but here's my speach for the most part =)

"Kamiakin Class of 2010 – 4 years of high school went fast. No on ever said it would be easy or that we would enjoy each and every day. But the end is coming near when all that we have lived day in and day out for 12 years will end. We are soon to be heading off in our own directions of life. Ready to begin chasing the dreams in which God has given us. Reality still has not hit me that in 3 days we will be sitting amongst a sea of Red caps waiting to walk across stage to get our empty diploma folders. I know that some of you are stoked for the day. Some of you are scared out of your minds because God is teaching you to wait and you still don’t know what is to come. Personally, I’m not sure what to think. I’m overwhelmed with a mix of emotions such as excitement, joy, fear, anxiousness, stress, and even wonderment of the journey to come. To think that we have made it through one of the biggest chapters in our lives.

Over everything I’ve learned these past four years, the thing that has left the greatest mark on my life is learning to rely on God’s strength.

In 8th grade volleyball, before every serve, I would repeat the verse ‘Philippians 4:13  - “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” I was taught this verse when I was little by my parents and I held onto it every time I was afraid of something. It was a child’s faith of relying on God for everything. To say those simple words let me know that God was there helping me. To say those words is just the start of God’s strength though. That phrase doesn’t even expand to the size of how strong our mighty God is. I’ve realized that his strength is more then a phrase repeated in my head to pacify as something to calm my nerves down.

I can guarantee that each of you have had hardships in life. The reality is that they are not over. Life is full of challenges. At one moment your life will be going great and the next you will feel like everything is being taken from you. You could go from being rich one day, and having all your money stolen from you on your way home from work that night. You’re family may be thriving, but the next day you find out you just lost one of your parents, or even a child. But who we become is built off of how we handle these situations in life.

I love the story of Job. I really recommend you guys reading it. So Job is a farmer with seven songs and three daughters (10 kids). He owned 11,000 different livestock… 7,000 sheep, 3,000 camels, 500 teams of oxen, and 500 female donkeys. He was the richest man in the area. Why was this man so blessed? He was a man of integrity who followed God with every ounce of being that he was. One day God and Job were having a conversation. The Lord said (in verse 8), “Have you noticed my servant Job? He is the finest man in all the earth. He is blameless – a man of complete integrity. He fears God and stays away from evil.” Satan replied “Yes, but Job has good reason to fear God. You have always put a wall of protection around him and his home and his property. You have made him prosper in everything he does. Look how rich he is! But reach out and take away everything he has, and he will surely curse you to your face!” God gave permission to test Job, but tells him not to harm him physically. So Satan does. Satan destroyed Job’s children, servants, livestock, herdsman, and home. Yet still, Job cried out to God in his weakness. When god spoke to Job in the midst of his storm, Job fell in humble reverence before God, speechless. Can you imagine having every single thing taken from you! You are left alone, your parents are gone, your siblings, your home, your college money, your car, your health – everything. What would you do? Would you fall down at Jesus’ feat declaring He is God?

Each and every one of the things that we go through is for a purpose. In this case it was a test of character.

Last year I ran for ASB President. Ms. Kailee Dunn won and has done and awesome job this year. Though I hold no bitter feelings towards her, the loss was hard for me. It was like loosing dream you had always chased after. What I learned from this though resulted in my learning what God’s strength really was. When I turned to God, my heart was filled with peace and my eyes were opened to the lessons he had for me from the hardship. He wanted me to learn to open my heart for all types of people. He wanted me to learn that our plans won’t always turn out the way we want them to be. I learned to live in a constant state of prayer as I relied on God to put together the broken pieces of where I was.

Over the past couple years; my family has faced some hardships that could have broken many families. But I have seen God tear back the rug, say this is what needs to be dealt with, help us sweep up the mess, and bring peace in the home. In the end he brought my family closer together through it.

This past year, class of 2010 lost a classmate and fellow friend, Conner Knoblich. Watching his family and friends, I have seen God bring strength in which seems like a hopeless situation. I have seen God show others to not cry in sadness over the loss of a dear friend, but rejoice in the life he took full advantage of.

Each of these things has become part of my testimony. None of these situations were supposed to be joyful or easy, but they taught me more about myself then any other time of joy in my life could have ever taught me. They allowed me to look at life in a new perspective – as beautiful no matter how tough life gets. I’ve learned to take advantage of every moment and realize that everything I go through is for the growth of my character and relationship with God. God doesn’t give us hard times to laugh at us, he gives them to us so that we will push in closer to him.

A new song just came out by Amy grant called “Better then a Hallelujah.” The song talks about in the midst of our troubles, our cry out for help is better to God then anything else we could say to God.

“God loves a lullaby In a mothers tears in the dead of night….God loves the drunkards cry, The soldier’s plea not to let him die…The woman holding on for life, The dying man giving up the fight, The tears of shame for what's been done,
The silence when the words won't come…”

When we pour out our miseries, God hears the voice of his children crying out to him, and he’ll respond. He wants us to come and turn to him through our trials, because they are part of his plan to help us grow.

I want your guys to read Philippians 4:4-7.
It reads “…always be full of joy in the Lord. I say it again – rejoice! Let everyone see that you are considerate in all you do. Remember the Lord is coming soon. Don’t worry about anything, instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand…”

To me, this verse sums up how to live in Christ. Have joy, be considerate, don’t worry, pray, give God your needs, and praise Him.

In a theology class I’ve been going to with Mr. Benscotter, we talked about chickens. If you want to raise chickens, what do you need to do first? Build a chicken coop. Similar, in Genesis 1, God created man last. Why? Because he had to prepare our place first – He needed to create light, night and day, time, skies and water, land, plants, fruits and vegetables, the stars and the moon, and the animals – all for the purpose of putting us on earth and giving us a place to live and survive.

Just like god had a plan for all he created for us, God has a plan for every little things we go through. It is all so that we can live out our full purpose in life.

Every hardship we go through is for God’s greater purpose. It’s to allow us to grow in character and in Christ. Seek God through it all and you will find God’s strength and peace. It is all for a greater plan. Though we may not be able to see it – we have to trust God.
I encourage you all to seek God through your trials. Drawn strength from God and realize that it is all for a greater purpose. Thanks! =)"

This is my heart and the main thing I've learned in high school! 

One day of high school left - excited, sad...

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